Raising Souls in a Culture that Forgets Them

You, my friend, are so very valuable.

This post was originally featured on Cultivating the Beautiful Life, my Substack newsletter. Subscribe here to get it in your inbox every time.

What does a life well-tended mean? 

I ponder the question myself, carefully clipping back the roses after the long winter’s wear. Rain drops dot my cheeks and land in perfect circles on the newly budding leaves, but I don’t mind. It matches my mood, as the garden so often does. My knees are caked with mud, I can feel pepples in my rain boots, and the clippings from the courtyard garden alone are already in a pile four feet tall. There is much work to do - and I do it in silence, pondering what I’m getting right and what I’m getting wrong in this “tending to life”. 

There was more time to contemplate the question a few weeks ago. Tucked into a historic home in a medieval village in rural Umbria, the noise of the modern world was dampened by the large swaths of thick forest and small roads. It’s no secret that humans think best in silence. This is often why I intentionally garden with no radio, no speaker, no earphones. Just the sound of my labored breath as I saw off limbs from an over-aggressive peach tree. It’s in these moments that I seem to spot the problems - as if the quiet labor is what draws them to the surface where I can pluck out like weeds. 

A life-well tended is the goal of us homemakers, opting daily to place value in what culture says has none.

I was reminded of this many times over in Italy. “Quatro figli…” I would hear murmured on the streets as we walked past. Our first few days in the village, I interpreted the remarks as a bit of a scoff. No doubt, our family of six stood out in a village of less than six thousand people. But soon, the older Umbrians began to congratulate us on our four children. They understood their value and shared in our delight of them, offering them treasures and encouragement. In a modern culture that values death and barrenness, we were reminded that children are a gift from the Lord. 

So are you.

Homemakers, though I can’t answer the question of a “life well-tended” for you exactly, I can unashamedly proclaim that what is good, true, and beautiful is what makes life well-tended. This is what has been true for all of humanity and what will continue to be true as far as we can see into the future.

Humans have value, distinct and unique, because we bear the image of our Creator. 

What are we doing as homemakers, if not tending to the needs of humans? Whether they were born from our loins, adopted in, or simply find themselves at our table and in our care for a time, the art of homemaking continues to be valuable in this modern culture because we’re caring for souls.

And souls will always matter.

I dive deeper into the idea of a life well-tended as I pull aggressively growing mint from another bed it’s not allowed in. My fingers are sore from the constant tugging and twisting of effort but the rain has subsided for a moment, and I find myself intoxicated by the smell and the sweet chatter of spring lambs in our pasture close by. They zoom through the empty pasture - yet to be filled in by growing, tall grasses for summer grazing. For now, the small flock can leap and sprint freely along the hillside. I chuckle to myself - it’s a bit idyllic in the moment. Is this a life-well tended? Small moments of delight and pleasure curated amongst the chaos and demands of an escalating culture?

But what chance does the homemaker have against the world? 

When the children were younger, Stuart and I used to often joke that we knew there would always be jerks in the world, but our goal as parents was to not raise them. 

Turns out, the greatest contribution we can make to society doesn’t come from casting a vote or flying a flag - it comes from raising children who are honest, hard-working, faithful, contributing, generous, and kind members of society. 

Turns out, the homemaker actually has an extremely valuable role to play against the rising tide of the world. In a well-tended home, she offers rest for the weary, prayers for the lowly, food for the hungry, comfort for the distraught. A homemaker has the capability to nourish, to build, to inspire, to grow, and to create a training ground for the next generation of humans. 

From inside the walls of her home, she proclaims good news to those who enter in: I will care for you. Here, you are loved. And secure, loved children treated with kindness grow into secure, loving adults who treat others kindly.

Though the internet is surely not a replacement for the physical walls that keep us protected from the mobs in our midst, if you feel without a place, you’re welcome here. Here, we value the hard, unglamorous work that surrounds building a family. We value children and each other. We value kindness and respect and general human decency. We value cultivating beauty in every day tasks and moments. We value souls.

Is a life well-tended easy? No. It’s also not guaranteed, tidy, or safe. And yet it is good. That which is good, true, and beautiful is not subject to cultural waves, governmental policy, popular fads, or even artificial intelligence. It is a rock: immoveable. 

The role of a homemaker, and her efforts in tending to her home and the souls in it, will never, ever, ever not be important. You, my friend, are so very valuable. And so, we are here for you in your effort. Let us link virtual-arms and band together proclaiming what is, and always will be, good, true, and beautiful.